I've been hiding out from Half Naked Thursday lately, but today I almost think it necessary to come out of hiding. I haven't been very involved in Fat Activism, but I appreciate and benefit from the great work they do. On February 13th a beautiful and daring woman that has inspired many died from ovarian cancer. She was younger than I am, and accomplished so much more. Heather MacAllister was the founder and artistic director of Big Burlesque and the Fat Bottom Revue. Leonard Nimoy immortalized her and the other dancers in some great nude photos you can see
here.
Through some odd piece of synchronicity, I was catching up on a new blogger friend's older posts. Rachel at
Terrible Wonderful World was the one who introduced me to Nimoy's photos, and pointed her readers to comments from 2005 on
Big Fat Blog. We fat women rarely see our naked bodies photographed with such kindness and love. It came out in the comments that doctors will blame a woman's fatness for her ovarian cancer, and fans were worried that Heather would get that as well. Heather herself responded, "The doctors are NOT blaming my fat, which is good for me for obvious reasons and good for them b/c I am ready with a blistering critique of such malpractice bullsh*t at any time if necessary. If you have ovarian cancer and are getting that b.s. from your doc, let me know and I will try to help you out."
In response to people mentioning envy of the dancers' self-acceptance and courage, Heather said,
1. Thank You to everyone who was moved by the pictures and wrote about it. That is why we did it, really. And I was very clear w/Leonard Nimoy about our fat liberation perspective and message, and I'm thrilled he's sending that out there to the mainstream press.
2. Me and the other models fight the same fat prejudice that you do. We get scared and struggle w/self-acceptance and self-love just like you. Just want you to know that "freedom is not free"; the freedom you see us enjoying is the result of constant hard work and eternal vigilance against the "tyranny of slenderness".
Heather lived with ovarian cancer for
nearly three years.
Not two days later another email friend of mine shared her grief over the pending death of the lovely Ms. MacAllister. She invited us to visit the
Big Burlesque Website, video found there. Later she shared with us the obituary sent to the New York Times. I learned Heather not only revived burlesque for fat women, she worked for many non-profits, was an advocate for transgenders, and worked in anti-racism training. Heather died here in Portland. With Krissy involved here in Fat PDX, who knew I had only 1 or 2 degrees of separation from such a queen of big beautiful women? Recent story on a performance by Heather for the
Cupcake dance found
here.
So, in honor of Heather Macallister, I'm getting naked. Click through for the full (NSFW) views. May all fat women see ourselves as beautiful as the burlesque ladies. May we see ourselves with as much kindness and love that Heather and the other ladies inspired in Leonard Nimoy.
1. a teasing glimpse of the tattoo 2. I like the way my eyes are caught looking down and looking at you. 3. the black blur in front is the half-naked glimpse of the cat.



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